I love our sweet old house and the wind whipping down the back fields into our yard of trees, ruffling chicken feathers and moody rooster feathers. I love the row of ducks waddling along the driveway, intent on making their morning sojourn to the puddles left by last night's rain. It is a happy, peaceful, busy life. And we want to leave it all behind. Soon.
Sean and I have always longed for this land of the free and the brave to not be our home.
He has spent a lot of time in Germany, speaks fluent German, so we thought, "Let's go to Germany!" But the whole German thing has been pretty vision-less. What would we do there? Start yet another church? There are plenty of good folks doing just that. The whole being put into prison for homeschooling has kind of put a damper on Germany. A wet, soggy sock kind of damper. Yuck.
Our hearts tend to fall into the working with families niche with a heavy compassion for children. We love being lay pastors in our local church. Love opening our home. Love seeing families and marriages strengthened through the power of God's Word. Love it, love it, love it. I've fallen into the habit this year of having a younger wife or mother over on a weekly basis. It is sometimes hard but it has been great and always worth the effort. At least two or three times a week people are here. It is good for my housecleaning routine in general and I've gotten really, really good at hiding laundry.
Sean and I believe in missional living, living intentionally, making the most out of every opportunity to share God's love. Sean views his small company not just as a way to provide for our family but as a resource for giving and an in into the community we live in.
Now the scheming continues. "Can we figure out how quickly we can have this house ready to sell?" I asked Sean this afternoon as he wrapped his arms around me and asked what was making me so quiet. The times after I spend in prayer I feel this the heaviest. Sometimes I want to put my hands over my ears and not "hear" any more.
The house is overwhelming, a huge project, and I feel my heart palpitate faster as the mental list of what needs to be done adds up. Selling it to DIY'ers ready to dig in would be fantastic! But there are rooms to be finished, a roof to be put on, exterior painting to be done, a new furnace to be installed... I really hate being tied to a house.
Neither of us want to raise our children in a have-it-all society, focused on the joys of Disney, placated by TV shows, caught up in a culture that has nothing profitable to offer. I want them to see other children with needs and the joy of being part of a solution. I want them to experience need for themselves and experience the joy God supplies in the midst of it. Our American lives are too cushy.
Where will we go? I have no idea. Somewhere where God can use a mother who can butcher a chicken and a husband who can build/fix anything. Only God knows. I'm sure He does.
So if you feel the urge to pray for the Cultivating Home crew, pray that God would lead us and guide us and prepare our way financially, even now preparing a buyer for our house. It is in His hands.
Have a peaceful night,