Saturday, May 10

We sat in a fancy hotel lobby, homemade cookies lying in open canisters and tins before us on the dark coffee table, each of us sipping our hot tea or coffee while the winter wind whipped around bitterly outside, quietly shaking the tall lobby windows.
Light from the tiffany lamps fell across the faces of seven or eight different women, each of us at different places in the varied seasons of motherhood.

Meeting once a week like this at night, with peaceful and quiet contemplations, laughter, cookies, hot drinks, and God's Word; we shared our hearts as mothers and learned from one another before slipping into our vehicles and back into our separate busy worlds.

That night we talked about the influence of mothers, particularly the influences we had experienced as children and now as grown children.
Most of the women in our cozy circle didn't have warm and fuzzy mothering to look back on as a basis for their own mothering and were daily finding themselves carefully treading into new territory without a map.
There were some somber stories exchanged that night as cookies were quietly crunched and hot drinks continued to be sipped.
Most of us had grown up under mothers who had been "liberated" and had dealt with, at some point, mothers who were physically or emotionally absent from our lives.
Others of us had had mothers committed to their families, and whether in optimum situations or not, had done the absolute best that they could have.

All of us that night realized what a heavy thing motherhood is. Heavy and real and living and essential.

I read a great article on motherhood recently, asking the readers if motherhood is something we see as just a phase of life to survive or get through.
Too often, I think that we mothers think in survival language. "If I can just get through this child's terrible two's", or "If I can just keep busy these last weeks of pregnancy", or "If I can just find a way to occupy her so she'll give me some quiet..."

Trying to pass the time on seasons that God has placed us in and that He has ordained for specific reasons.
Passing all the seasons with baited breath until, before we know it, motherhood as we know it changes and we're left longing for those days of having an energetic two year old or a talkative four year old, just wanting to sit on our laps and be with us.

I have plenty to think about and contemplate for this year's Mother's Day on the subject of mothering. I see, in myself, so many areas that need improvement that I feel helpless to accomplish on my own. I'm reminding myself to draw deeply into the strength and wisdom of God and His Word as here in this home we negotiate sleep and potty training and sibling quarrels and all the various training and nurturing that our children need.

My heart is full and thankful and determined.

As mothers, won't you seek God's will and design for your family with me?
Happy Mother's Day,


Pam said...

You are wise to have this perspective when your children are younger and you can purpose to savor them and "be ALL there," in the moment. It is so easy to rush them ahead to the next milestone. It goes so fast. Having a baby this past year in my mid-forties has opened my eyes to a wonder I missed in my twenties with my first two children. God is good! Hannah - your baby is darling! Blessings to you on Mother's Day! What a special day for you!

Anonymous said...

And I love the part about *living* through it all and not trying to survive it all...the part about mothers who were absent emotionally or physically. I don't want to repeat the legacy.

Have a blessed Mother's Day, Hannah.


Tonya said...

Wow! Beautiful post, Hannah! I find one of the most challenging aspects of mothering is living in the moment. I wasted so many beautiful moments when I was a younger mother and everything was new and overwhelming. Now, as an older mother, who is a "little" more experienced and "wise" I know how quickly these years pass. We truly need to enjoy them and learn the lessons God has for us during them.

Mimi said...

great reminder:)

Anonymous said...

"Trying to pass the time on seasons that God has placed us in and that He has ordained for specific reasons."

Thanks for this. I'm trying to find the meaning and beauty in the season I'm going through - with three pregnancies in my past and no babies alive. It's not easy, but oh the contrast in my feelings about so many things between the time before the pregnancies and now. The way I appreciate things has been transformed. Even the seemingly ugly times can be a blessing.

Thanks for your blog. I always enjoy it. :)


Me said...

Dear Jennifer at Joy of Frugal Living, how my heart aches for you! I cannot even imagine the heartache you've experienced and I wish my wishes could send you a chubby baby!
No doubt about it though - rough seasons do teach us valuable lessons. There isn't a day goes by with Christopher that I don't remember that each day is a gift and thank God for the miraculous blessing of his life. (thankful for the other kiddos too!)