Wednesday, March 12

Investing in Marriage, a wife's view

How can we best encourage and support our husbands? I asked Sean this question tonight, wanting a manly input, and so some of these ideas come from a man's point of view. He was in the middle of watching two machines kill each other on his movie and so the elaborations are mine.

1.) Give respect with love.
I've written before on respect and how that is for most men, their greatest need/desire. Under this heading I would also suggest never speaking poorly about or to your husband in a social situation. Not only does it disgrace him but it doesn't make you look your best either.
Start here. Say, "Honey, I respect you so much for ____________________." Fill in the blank.
"I respect you for being a man after God, for seeking His will for our family, for being a great provider, for loving our children the way you do....."

2.) Pray for your husband.
Praying specifically for Sean and his needs is something that strengthens our marriage. Taking time every morning to pray for him is a simple way to support him spiritually. How do I know what to pray for?

3.) Talk to your husband.
Say, "Honey, I've set time aside every day to pray for you. Is there anything specific I can be praying for?" Date nights and time alone talking will also give you insight in what to pray for. There is also a great little book out there titled The Power of a Praying Wife chock full of ideas of what to pray for.

4.)Make your husband aware.
Sean said that me making him aware that I am praying for him makes him feel supported and encouraged.
"Babe, I've been praying for that contract with such and such a company. I know God is our provider and not the economy and I can't wait to see how He moves. I'm praying for you and for the business."

5.) Don't neglect the intimacy in marriage.

Granted, this is not the way Sean phrased things, but you get the point.
I once read that women need to feel loved in order to be intimate and men need to be intimate in order to feel loved. Being intimate with our husbands encourages them and supports them. While I believe this is such a vital issue in marriage, that's all I'll say there in order to keep this G rated. ;)

6.) Give honor and respect to you husband in the home.
I mentioned the manner in which we speak to and about our husbands in social situations and this applies to the home as well. Making a concerted effort to speak only respectfully to Sean in front of our children instills these values of love and respect in their hearts as well. We don't call names in our home. Ever.
Besides our speech, we can give respect and honor to our husbands in a million little practical ways. Doing his laundry, giving him the hottest off the griddle pancakes, having the kids pick out the biggest, nicest cookie to bring to Papa who is busy working on the house, straightening his night table, cooking his favorite meals and not cooking ones he dislikes, dressing in clothing that he likes, taking time to straighten and primp for a few minutes before he gets home....

What other ways can you think of to honor, encourage, and support your husbands? Husbands, any additional suggestion on this one?

1 comment:

Karl Bastian said...

great site, I am eager to follow it. However, you should know you have an error in your settings: the site has no name so in an RSS reader such as Bloglines.com the name of your site is simply a period - yes, nothing but a dot, even though your RSS feed works fine. Probably in your blogger setting there is a field for name that is blank. Hope you don't mind me telling you, you are welcome to delete this comment, didn't know how else to inform you. I'm sure others would love to follow your posts in an RSS reader.

Keep the good stuff coming! My wife and I have had some great discussions on your posts.